


red lights, stop signs

by elyssefics



Series: hosie's license au [1]
Category: Legacies (TV 2018)
Genre: #hosierainkiss, Alternate Universe - Canon, Angst, Based on drivers license - Olivia Rodrigo (Song), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Heavy Angst, Inspired by drivers license - Olivia Rodrigo (Song), I’m sorry in advance, Jealous Hope, Minor Jasie, One Shot, Post-Break Up, Songfic, There’s a rain kiss, drivers license au, love hurting yall, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-17 17:07:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28852551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elyssefics/pseuds/elyssefics
Summary: hosie x drivers license au“Kiss me already, will you?” The brunette said with the same flirt Hope gave.As the rain poured even harder, they didn’t give a fuck whatsoever. Their lips touched one another, filling each other with the love they have, basically filling a glass of water, but with passion, and of course, you don’t rush the pouring of the water. You take your time, make it perfect, and try not to spill.orPost-break up of hosie, Josie has another lover, while Hope, still processes everything, and tries to move on.But, how could you move one, to the person who thought was your epic love? Do you? or you don't?
Relationships: Hope Mikaelson/Josie Saltzman, Jade/Josie Saltzman
Series: hosie's license au [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2127435
Comments: 22
Kudos: 63





	red lights, stop signs

**Author's Note:**

> hey!! i’ve come up with another random au that i decided to make once drivers license came out, so yeah, here we are.
> 
> **highly recommend, if you have never listened to the whole song, listen before you read this or maybe while you read it, totally up to you. 
> 
> p.s. this was heavily inspired by the song, drivers license by olivia rodrigo <3

_ “Babe!!”  
_

_ Josie said repeatedly to Hope who was asleep, like a child who was desperate to play at the playground. _

_ “Iya, wake up. Let’s go outside.” Josie excitedly persuaded. _

_ Hope replied in groans, still tired and fast asleep. She didn’t want to wake up just yet, because she had a test that same day and she wanted to get her beauty rest. Although, Josie was somehow excited about something. _

_ The former finally gave in and stood up, with her eyes squinting, because the lights were on. She noticed that the weather was cool, she had her blanket still covering her head and her whole body. _

_ The brunette giggled how Hope looked like. _

_ “Finally, sleepyhead. It’s raining outside, and it’s nighttime!?!?!” The brunette said with such a childish and exciting voice. _

_ Hope was still processing with everything going on. _

_ “Ugh, come on.” Josie rolled her eyes as she sighed. _

_ She intertwined her hands with the auburn. A warm feeling entered her body. The brunette pulled her out of the room with such excitement in her smile and grabbed both of their coats. _

_ Hope scoffed, “What could excite this woman at 4 in the morning this much?” Closed the door, and sneakily tiptoe out of their dorm, to go out in the garden. _

_ “Are you crazy? It’s raining out there.” Hope worried in Josie’s scheme. _

_ “Don’t worry. I got you.” Josie said with a promising look, that she will make sure that the auburn wouldn’t get sick or that she was safe with her. _

_ The look had put the auburn at ease and not worry about a thing. _

_ They were at the back door, getting ready to go out in the rain, knowing they would be caught, but they did it anyways. _

_ The rain pouring was loud enough that they could hear it from the inside, the continuous pattering of the rain. Its sound starts to become satisfying and calm. _

_ “Here. Wear this.” Josie said in a commanding tone. _

_ Hope took the raincoat and wore her shoes, while Josie got her umbrella and was just waiting for the auburn to put on her shoes. Once she stood up, the brunette intertwined her hands with Hope, but not in a quick way. It was with passion and felt like she had been doing this for years, and wasn’t tired of doing it over and over again. _

_ The auburn looked down at their hands and glanced to the brunette, facing the door, looking like she was ready to do anything, ready to conquer the world with her being by her side. _

_ She plastered a smirk, and tightened her grip on their hands, showing she was ready. _

_ They opened the door, feeling the rain pouring on their backs and the breeze through their face as they ran across the garden to their favorite spot. _

_ Laughing and screaming came out as they ran, trying not to get wet and trying to fit under that one umbrella Josie brought. _

_ When they finally reached their spot, Josie suddenly removed the umbrella over them, and the rain started to heavily pour on them. Smiles appeared widely on the brunette’s face knowing the reaction of the auburn would be unpleasant after what she did. _

_ Well, Hope obviously had an unpleasant reaction at first, which was a dull facing showing how pissed she felt after Josie removed the umbrella. But, it eventually faded and all she could feel how free, she was outside, in the rain, with the girl she treasures the most. _

_ It was perfect. Everything. _

_ Then, felt those soft and warm hands even in the cold rain, on her face. The brunette leaned her forehead against Hope’s as she was just smiling with the satisfaction of everything around her. The weather, the sky, the muddy grass, and most especially the girl she wants to spend her eternity with, all in one night, right here, in front of her. _

_ ________________________ _

_ When the rain got worse, Hope worried that Josie might get sick since she has a weak immune system. Well, that was what Hope observed from her. _

_ “HEY!! I do not have a weak immune system.” She angrily said, getting teased of course. _

_ “I’m kidding. Lighten up, but we really should get going.” _

_ “No, wait. I’m waiting for something.” Josie insisted. _

_ Her head was wandering around the night sky, looking for something. Hope was confused on what it was. The sky looked like pitch black, no stars or anything, just pure rain. _

_ When, her eyes grew big when she saw a shooting star, like she had been waiting for this moment for years. She had that smile where you could tell she was purely happy. _

_ “Quick! Make a wish.” Josie mumbled but it was easy to hear, as she closed her eyes, still smiling and mumbling a few words that Hope wouldn’t hear because it was private. _

_ Hope didn’t get to close her eyes, she just immensely stared with a smile, at the brunette and admired how happy she was at this moment. She was star struck that she couldn’t believe that she was hers, this beautiful soul in front of me, is really hers. _

_ As Josie opened her eyes, she just saw Hope staring at her, looking like she didn’t close her eyes once. Her stare was so...so mesmerizing. It was one of the things that Josie fell for the auburn. It showed how Hope was really in love with her. _

_ The brunette chuckled, “Hey, why didn’t you close your eyes?” A voice with genuine concern came out of her pouty mouth. _

_ Hope smiled widely, then looked down as she put her arms around Josie’s waist, pulling each other closer to one another. She bit down her lip, then glanced towards the brunette. _

_ “Because...I already have what I wished for.” Hope said in a flirty voice as she played with one of Josie’s strands of hair, which made Josie roll her eyes, at one of Hope’s ridiculous pick-up lines. They were cringey and those cliché pick-up lines that couples say to each other, but obviously with a little flirty voice and Hope saying it, it could also be oddly romantic, I guess. _

_ “Kiss me already, will you?” The brunette said with the same flirt Hope gave. _

_ As the rain poured even harder, they didn’t give a fuck whatsoever. Their lips touched one another, filling each other with the love they have, basically filling a glass of water, but with passion, and of course, you don’t rush the pouring of the water. You take your time, make it perfect, and try not to spill. _

_ They were carefree that night. The only thing they cared about was their mouths getting into one another. Trying not to take it to far, and taking it steady. They didn’t even notice that the rain started to pour harder every second, to the point it would hurt your head. Their foreheads just leaned one another, smiling and both their hands intertwined to each other. _

_ Then, Hope detached her hands, to place her arms around the brunette, and her head on her shoulder. _

_ The latter curiously asked, “What did you wish for?” Hope softly said, trying to keep the moment. _

_ “Why?” Josie teased, in a voice where she knew what the auburn was doing. _

_ Hope chuckled, and held on to that smile of hers. _

_ And said, “Just curious,” as her head lifting up from Josie’s shoulders. _

_ Her sight was blurry, because of the rain, blurring her vision. But, she could still see the beauty of the brunette, while the rest of the world, was blurry, like she was the only who mattered in the world. That, she was the constant who was so clear, while the others, were very difficult to see.  
_

_ “This.” _

_ “I wished for this to never end. I wished for this to last forever, for us to last forever.” The brunette stated with confidence, she sounded that she was sure of it, that she wouldn’t have to think about it nor give second thoughts about it. She sounded madly in love with her. _

_ Things to started to slowly blur around her, she realized it wasn’t the rain anymore. There was something wrong. She somehow couldn’t hear the rain pouring anymore. All she could hear, was the last giggle the brunette made. She started to panic. She didn’t care with what’s going with her. _

_ The only thing that was on her mind that time, was Josie. If she was okay or not. Was she safe? _

_ As she lost her vision, she then screamed the name of the girl who owned her heart, Josie. _

___________________________________________

She suddenly heard someone repeatedly shouting her name out loud. But, one things for sure, it wasn’t Josie’s.

“HOPE!”

She finally went back to reality. At the thought that made her even more devastated was that, she was daydreaming all of it.

And it was Lizzie, who was shouting her name.

Her senses came back, the noise from the students in the cafeteria got louder as she “woke” up in a dream.

“Hey, you okay?”

Lizzie genuinely asked, with worry, since what happened with her and Josie.

“You barely touched your food, for the last few days.”

Hope ignored, the concern of the blonde. She just played with her food, with her fork, and kept on glancing at them,

_Jade and Josie_.

“No, I’m not hungry.” The auburn said in a monotone voice, sounding like that she didn’t want to talk to anyone, based from her dry reply.

She just stared at the two, flirting and feeding each other in the table, which was not that far from them, just far enough so that they won’t be able to notice Hope staring at them intensely. But, she doubted that they would even notice her once.

“You want to talk about it?” Lizzie softly said, careful trying not to hit a nerve, because she has quite a temper.

“I dreamt about her, Lizzie.” Hope said with such a voice who sounded like it went through so much pain, and anguish. It sounded so tired of living.

“AGAIN!” She loudly complained.

“It’s been weeks, now. I try to forget about us, but it’s just hard. It’s too difficult to _just_ forget what we had. The one thing that I was so sure about, it’s not that easy to just forget about that. Ever since we broke up I feel so empty without her. I feel so- s-so, helpless. So lost. I have no idea how she got over me like that. Or maybe, what we had, was just _that_ simple to forget and move on. I don’t know anymore, Lizzie. She was basically my other half, she completed me. She made me better, it gave me a purpose to live. It gave me a reason to live. Life without her, would just be disastrous. And, I don’t even know I can live without her. Might as well, end my life right now, if i don’t have any reason to live for. I just miss her. I miss us. I just, wonder, was I enough for her? Wasn’t my best enough? If not, she could’ve told me…” Hope stopped as her tears tried to catch up with her, the verge of crying was close.

“S-she could’ve told me, and I would’ve done better. I would’ve continued fighting for us, I would’ve done something just so that she wouldn’t leave. Maybe, she just stayed because she had pity for me..maybe she didn’t care for me after all-“ Hope started to doubt the brunette, she started to think all sorts of things, which clearly couldn’t be possible.

“No. She would never fake her love for you. She wouldn’t do that to you. I saw how she would look at you, like you were the only person there in _her_ world. She didn’t care about what would others think of her, she didn’t care about the rumors that would go on about “Josie Saltzman, a siphon witch dating the all-powerful tribrid, the daughter of Klaus Mikaelson and Hayley Marshall, Hope Mikaelson,” all she cared about was, _just_ you and no one else. Hell, I think she even cared more about you than me.” Lizzie said with a convincing voice, trying to cheer up in every way possible, even though she didn’t expect that it would work, because she has been doing this since the day they broke up.

“I don’t know anymore. I can’t believe, I can’t believe she moved on so fast and how I’m still here suffering and trying to process our break-up which was like 3 weeks ago.” The auburn stood up with a feeling where she was basically tired of life, and she wanted to quit right there and there. She scoffed, and left in a hurry to her dorm.

Lizzie sighed and watched her run to her room, probably cry again. As she looked at Jade and Josie, at the other table, laughing and having fun. Honestly, the blonde felt bad for Hope. She was right, how could Josie move on just like that? How could she move on from her and find someone new?

“Was Hope not enough for her? She literally had everything. Why would she look for more, when it was right in front of her?” Lizzie thought as she ate the last pieces of food on her plate and headed to her next class.

Many classes later, it was already after school hours. The sky looked somehow beautiful from the school. Most of the students would camp outside at the garden, at night to stargaze. Those were definitely Hope and Josie’s favorite things to do.

All of the students were in their respective dorms including Hope, studying because it’s their finals week starting tomorrow.

The auburn was just painting the sky as her model, and listening to her new favorite song, drivers license by Olivia Rodrigo. She was obsessed with the song, besides the fact it basically described what was going on with her right now...

As she mumbled the lyrics with her soft and calming voice,

_I got my driver’s license last week_

_Just like we always talked about_

_‘Cause you were so excited for me_

_To finally drive up to your house_

_But today I drove through the suburbs_

_Crying ‘cause…_

_you weren’t around._

A tear started to form at the edge of her eye, as she mumbled the last phrase. Like that represented her last straw of hope for them, it just fell.

She wiped her tear, with her fingers, but as soon as she saw paint in her hands. She realized how messy she was, literally and figuratively. She was surprised that how could one girl, shake her world that bad? How she affected her that bad? Others would say, “It’s just a girl, blah, blah.”

But, she thought, “She wasn’t _just_ a girl. She was _my_ world.”

She scoffed at how cheesy that sounded, that she would hear that in romance tv shows and movies. She would never believe she would say that for someone else. Because she never believed in love, she always thought that it was just a waste of your time, and it was just wasn’t worth it. Maybe she got it from her dad, who didn’t believe he was loved and pushed everyone away, just because he didn’t want anyone to love him and he would end up, broken. 

But, since the day Josie and Hope met. All of that, changed. She was basically the reason, why she believed, love was actually worth it, and it was possible that there will be someone out there who will actually see your worth and love you wholeheartedly.

That’s why it affected the auburn that deep, she was her first love. How could that not hurt?

As she drifted in her thoughts, she realized, the paint was dripping on her apron. A frown appeared on her face. She mumbled a curse, just right on time, a knock was heard on her door.

She quickly stood up to get the door, still carrying that smile, not knowing who that was.

The door creaked, just as she opened the door. Her frown was welcomed with a smile, she never knew she would see again, Josie’s smile.

Her heart skipped a beat, and with the change of heart, she made that frown into a smile. She hasn’t smiled in weeks, after the break-up, well not really. For the last few weeks, it was a fake smile that she would show everyone just so they know she was doing “alright.” But, this one, this one was obviously different.

The way she sparked her eyes, only when she was really excited or happy about something. The way she lifted her cheeks, not forcefully. She lifted those cheeks, willingly. Like she wanted to smile, for her.

“Hi!” Josie said with a small, but cheerful greeting.

The auburn thought how she hasn’t heard that voice in weeks, that particular voice, wherein she was happy.

She felt a sad-happy feeling at the thought that, Jade made her happy. Sad, because she wasn’t the reason why she smiled like that. Happy, because Josie was happy with Jade, and that was what really matters, right?

“Hey, what are you doing here.” The auburn softly said.

“You painting?” Josie asked, in assurance if she was doing something or not.

“Umm, how’d you know?” Hope suspected.

“Your face.” The brunette pointed at her own face, to point out that Hope still had paint on her cheek.

“Oh.” She chuckled nervously, embarrassed because she forgot it had been there the whole time. She tried to clean it out on her own, but she made it worse, because she even had paint on her hands.

“Here, let me do it.” Josie insisted, and went closer to her face to clean it. Their faces were neck and neck, to the point where they could feel each other’s breath.

Hope ended up staring at the brunette’s pouty lips, as she removed the paint on her cheek. Once she was finished, she shook her head, removing the thoughts that were in her head.

“ _Well, that was awkward. Kill me already._ ”  She thought.

“So, are you busy?” Josie said in a shy, but hopeful voice.

“Hmm, not really. Why?” She replied, trying to sound oblivious on what the brunette was intending.

“You wanna watch a movie?” Smiled, hoping the answer would be a yes.

Hope startled at the sound of it. She smiled, trying not to be obvious that she was really excited.

“Yeah, sure! Outside?”

“Yes, just like the old days!”

_The old days._

_How long was it really for her..._

“Sure! I’ll just get the blankets and my laptop.” She didn’t mind what she said, because she was that excited.

As the brunette left, she closed the door, and jumped on the bed happily. She had never felt like this in a while, nor smiled that big. She always felt so empty, but now, she felt more alive. She knew that they were still friends since they broke up, but Josie really never asked her to hang out because she was always busy with Jade.  
  


_The power you have over me, Jo., damn._

____________________________  
  


She was outside, under the stars in the cold, all ready for her movie night with Josie, and maybe they could even do a little of stargazing, if there was time.

The latter brought the most cozy and warmest blankets she could find, with fairy lights decorated on top of the bushes. I mean it was too much, but the auburn was really excited for this, so she obviously had to put some effort. She didn’t want to be evident that she was waiting for this day to come, because it would just be sad for her.

Waiting out under the cold stars, and wrapped in her blanket plus her jacket, shivering. The plate of tuna sandwich and her hot hazelnut chocolate drink started to get cold, as she waited for the brunette, to go outside to their favorite spot out in the garden.

Few minutes went by, the temperature started to drop by the minute. She tried to wait a little longer, but she thought it was getting late, so she had to check up on Josie, if she was still busy doing something.

As she walked down the corridors headed to Josie’s room with her arms crossed, as she felt the warmth from the heaters entering her body, but still feeling the coldness from outside, she felt a slight worry.

It wasn’t just any feeling, it was a feeling wherein she was familiar with it, like she felt it before, like she’d dealt with it before, but she couldn’t put her finger on it.

This feeling felt like defeat. Loss, for some reason. It was definitely heavy, and she could feel that something bad was about to happen, something she would regret this moment.

She slowly walked towards Josie’s room, and let out a big sigh, about to knock on the door, when she heard giggles from the inside, loud enough to be heard out in the corridors.

It was hers...

_Josie’s giggles._

She haven’t heard it in a long time. It made her feel safe and comfort everytime she would hear it, from those pouty lips of hers. It made her feel at home.

She smiled at the thought, but as soon as she smiled, she heard another giggle. It sounded really familiar, but she didn’t recognize it at first. It didn’t bother her, but she was curious who it was, or maybe, it was just her overthinking. Maybe it was hers and she just couldn’t recognize it.

Continued to knock, with still a bad feeling on what she was getting into.

It took a good few seconds for the door to open, but as the door opened, it wasn’t who she expected it was.

It was _Jade_.

Then, saw Josie on the bed, smiling. A smile that she’d never seen before, a smile she didn’t get to see when they were together. It was different, and it was real. It hurt her, basically ruined her that she didn’t get to give that smile to the brunette. She basically hated herself for it. 

Her heart was like poked with a needle, and they never took it out. It stayed there, she couldn’t moved, still in shock. As a tear started to form at the edge of her eye, she quickly wiped the edge of her eye, with the jacket and coughed as if she didn’t feel anything, as if she didn’t feel any pain.

Jade looked at Josie, who’s smile was gone as soon as she saw Hope. She looked like she had forgotten to do something, which she did.

Josie approached the door, coming face-to-face with the auburn, standing there so awkwardly and wanting to cry literally in her arms and to seek comfort. She wanted her back. Her hand started to shake, as the brunette approached her, but hid it away so that she wouldn’t see.

It was a mistake coming here. It was a mistake agreeing to hang out with her, when all she will ever feel is pain, jealousy and regret. That was all she was expected to feel, but she did it anyway. She had to spend time with the girl, who she lost her chance with. Saying that just sounds so dumb and stupid.

She didn’t notice she was drifting in her thoughts, then snapped out of it, as she felt the presence of the brunette.

When Josie was about to say something, Hope went ahead.

“Don’t worry, about our hangout. Looks like you were busy anyway, and besides I was feeling a little sick, so I’ll just clean up and head to my room. If that’s okay with you?” Hope explained in the most normal way she could say it, considering she was feeling that much pain inside. Stopping herself not to even shed a tear, nor a voice crack.

“Oh, yeah. Don’t worry, hope you feel better!” Josie nodded, and smiled.

The auburn smiled, in the weakest way possible, and started heading outside to pack up the stuff she prepared. But, felt someone running towards her.

“By the way, sorry if I couldn’t make it. I saw how excited you were to watch the movie, if you want, you can watch it by yourself.” She assured.

“ _Screw the movie. I wanted to be with you._ ”  She thought.

“Nah, it’s fine. I’m good, don’t worry about me.” She lied.

Josie wasn’t convinced at all, since she knew how Hope felt when she was sad and when she wasn’t. But, she just let her go.

Running to the garden to pack up the things, she held onto the tears that was dying to fall since she knocked on that door.

While cleaning up, she had all these thoughts in her head, she had been dying to figure out. She needed to scream, cry, punch, kick, basically anything as long as it involves her releasing all the pain she felt.

Walking back to her room, carrying all those blankets and pillows, she couldn’t bare a second of not crying, so she broke down in the corridors of her room. She fell on the floor, with all her stuff piled up on her. She didn’t care anymore, she didn’t want to care anymore. She was tired of being herself. Tired of what was happening in her life, she just needed a break.

She broke down into tears and she tried to be silent as she can, but eventually Lizzie, heard her from her room. And went out to see what was all the fuss was about, then there she saw Hope balling her eyes out trying her very best to stop those tears by wiping it with her blankets, but it just wouldn’t stop.

Lizzie quickly bent down to Hope’s level to calm her down.

“Hey, what happened? I heard you and Josie hung out earlier. How’d it go?” The blonde softly said, she was hoping for a positive answer, but from the looks of it, it didn’t go that well.

“Not good.” Hope tried to talk, but her heart was aching to much to talk properly. She still had that needle poking her heart, stopping her to breathe.

“Nevermind, I shouldn’t have asked. Come on, let me help you with those.” Lizzie offered, trying to avoid hitting a nerve.

They were quiet going back to Hope’s dorm. Lizzie carried most of the stuff while Hope carried her blankets. She had stop crying, for a while, but she still had the face of an aftermath breakdown. As they settled in, Hope insisted to let Lizzie leave and to assure her she’ll be fine from now on, “Hey, Lizzie. Would you mind, leaving me for a bit? I think I just wanna be alone for now.” The auburn softly said.

“Yeah, sure.”

“By the way, thank you.”

“Thank you for what?” The blonde chuckled.

“For everything. Since we broke up, you were basically there for me. So, thank you. I really appreciate it.” Hope let out a small smile to show her that she really meant it and was sincere.

As Lizzie left her room, Hope jumped in her bed and layed down her bed, still hurt about earlier. But, she realized that there wasn’t a chance in hell that they would go back together again. What’s done is done. She just didn’t want to accept the fact that there was no chance of getting back together with Josie. Because, she was the first person who loved her for who she was. She respected her, loved her for what person she had become, didn’t judge her for her family nor didn’t disrespect her family, in general.

She loved her, for her.

She understood her, in ways she couldn’t think was possible.

And, it was just hard, to let that same person, go.

Her thoughts took control of her, she drifted as she thought deeply on the things that’s happening right now. How she felt that her and Josie’s past was like yesterday? How everything was real? How she couldn’t accept her defeat against herself? She almost had everything, but again, the universe or fate, perhaps, keeps delaying, Hope’s happiness.

_Maybe I wasn’t meant to be happy? Or maybe, I don’t deserve to receive happiness. I don’t deserve anything at all. I don’t know why, but that could be the message of the universe._

How she felt so insecure when she saw Jade with Josie and Jade herself. And, how she could never recover from the brunette, because she really thought she was the one and Hope was the one for her. They were literally perfect for each other, they promised to love each other forever, no matter what happens, until death, they’ll be in each other’s hearts..forever.

but, _when can forever really last?_

At this point, it’s basically  just a word, promising one another, to hope for the best and if not, then that’s that. 

Even thinking about the things they  used to do together, hurts her more. how hope would teach josie how to play football. how every night they would either watch movies outside and stargaze or practice football and, how josie would practice her spells as hope would paint her.

Josie was her favorite person to paint, and favorite person in general.

but, _there’s always an end to things_. am i right?

A tear came falling from her cheek. She wiped it immediately trying not to breakdown for someone who didn’t care about her anymore, it wasn’t worth it.

_I need to move on. I can do this. I’ll forget about you, about us. Yeah, it isn’t that hard right?_

The auburn decided to distract herself by cleaning and organizing her room. She went through some old stuff and organized them. Threw out some old clothes, things, books, the ones that she didn’t need anymore. She had to put her mind of things. I mean, I wouldn’t say it worked, but she had stumbled upon, a box. Full of old memories.

She sat down in hindrance knowing that this could either break her, or make her feel better, in a way. As she held the box in her hands, nervous to open it. Feeling the nostalgia from the box on her lap.

She caressed the top of the box, with their names written on it, together with silly drawings and doodles.

_Hope + Josie_

Then, at the bottom in small letters. It says...

_Soulmates to soulmates love story, we’ve been soulmates since the start_

Written in Josie’s handwriting.

Her heart sank, on how ironic and naive they thought that they would still be together since the day they started dating, that everything would go smoothly. But, they had no idea what was in store for them.

She let her pain out with a scoff, she pushed the box away and wanting to forget everything about them.

But, second thoughts started to form in her head. Thoughts about whether to move on and forget, or go back and reminisce the good times, still holding on to the hope of their relationship. She knew she had no chance in getting back with her, it’s just the feeling of comfort, that made her kept on going, but at the same time, the thought of it being the past, and it’s no longer here.

But then, maybe, this could seem like a closure. A closure to end her feelings for Josie, to end the hope she still has for their relationship, or whatever they have. She needed to end things, once and for all. She has to, she needs to, for her not the get end up hurting herself anymore.

As she started to convince herself that, she needed to do this, for closure and for whatever reasons there are.

She took a deep breath, lifted the lid, with her eyes closed, because it was probably easier that way for her.

As she opened her eyes in awe, of what she had saw, it was different kinds of things.

Things that reminded her of their past relationship. There were things inside that could either remind her of Josie or their relationship. She remembered that they each made a box for each other, a box full of things that reminded their love for each other. So, basically, if Hope had one, Josie had one too. She wondered, in expectation, did she throw hers out? or did she keep hers? But, she also reminded herself that going through this box of hers, is a way for her to move on and lock away the past.

Their past.

As she looked through the box thoroughly, she came across a crumpled piece of paper, that caught her eye, right after she opened the box. She knew what it was from the start, which frightened her. She avoided looking into that piece of paper, because it could either break her, or make her move on completely. But, either way, she needed to open it, just one last time.

So, that piece of paper, wasn’t just any it was a paper that they wrote on their first day, the first day that they became an actual couple.

The paper was still folded, but you could see the doodles on the exterior of it. As she slowly unfolded the paper, her unshed tears started to form, with memories starting to rush in her head. Mind, filled with mixed emotions. Not knowing how to feel with what’s happening.

Those small notes, doodles and drawings written by them, on that day. It seemed like it was yesterday, how time flies so fast.

But, the latter caught her eye the most. It was the odd paper at the back of the actual paper. Taped on the back, and folded. She slowly removed the tape, trying her best not to ruin the paper. 

Squinted her eyes, in confusion, wondering what was in her hands. Seeing her name, on one of the pages she folded.

_For Iya._

She looked even more confused, really curious on what was this. She had thought that Josie had written this, but she really wasn’t sure at this point, on not wanting getting her hopes up.

Thus, after she completely opened the letter, her tears somehow started to burst into amazement and in awe. Still couldn’t believe on what the brunette had written on there.

It was a  _song_.

A song about _her_.

And  for _her_.

Still couldn’t process anything, tears falling down from her eyes. Her clothes getting soaked and not being able to stop them. They just couldn’t stop, can’t they?

Her eyes, wandering over the piece of paper. Overwhelmed, with the amount of emotion coming from this song she wrote. She didn’t know how to feel. She knew Josie was a very talented singer and a songwriter, but she always was too shy, I guess, to write a song, or even show it to Hope. But, she reminded Josie that, the brunette could show her anything and be herself around her, but that doesn’t mean right now, however long it takes, to finally make her feel comfortable and being able to show her full-self around her. She would wait, even if it takes a thousand years, she will wait. 

Because, at the end, it will be all worth it. All that waiting, that patience, it would be all worth it.

It softened Josie, she had the look of satisfaction. She felt so happy with the auburn. She felt like she was the luckiest person in the world, to be able to spend time with her. 

_________________________________

  
She accomplished in having control of her emotions, so that she could finally read the song, but that plan failed, when she first read the title.

It was Josie’s nickname for her,

_i love you, iya. nothing more, nothing less._

Lying there on the floor, literally with no air left to breathe, with her nose stuffy and tears still falling from her eyes. But, as she holds the piece of paper in her arms. Embracing every piece of love that this paper holds. Hanging on, to her hope for their relationship, even though it was even impossible. She still hoped. 

It was obviously controversial, it would ruin her internally. But, she needed to take the risk. I mean she had to.

She cleared her mind, trying not to tear up, even though she wasn’t even reading the song yet. 

Each verse, she read. She noticed that there was some backstory behind it, then some are plan evident. Every memory of them, every laugh they would make, every kiss they would feel, and basically her, surpassed her mind. But, no difference, she cried in every one. She tried to avoid crying, but she knew she couldn’t do that.

Then, she broke. As she read the last lines, of the song.

_falling out of love with you,_

_I couldn’t bare to live in that lifetime._

_how could one look at this soul,_

_and not fall in love._

_was forever always like this?_

_such a feeling i would rather not say_

_but, i know this,_

_forever exists as long as it’s with you._  
  


The unbearable pain started to come beneath the surface, basically how ironic can this song really sond? Either way, she cried about the song, the pain, the irony, and the fact that she couldn’t get over them. It was too much for her.

She thought she was strong enough, she thought she was ready. But, she wasn’t. It was just buried deep inside of her, waiting for it to explode, and become the mess she is.

She had to take her mind off of this.

She threw the piece of paper, soaked in her tears. She tried not to get it wet, because it was special, in a way. But, then again, special for what? Josie’s gone. It would just bring her pain, and the memories that were already painful to her.

She grabbed her coat and her football, laying beside the bed, and rushed to the football field to clear her head.

She felt the cold breeze flowing through her hair, as she stepped out of the door. Every breeze dried out her tears, she started to calm down.

She saw the football field, scoffed at the memory of her and Josie practicing football, for every game. She would tackle her and they would just laugh until they end up on the ground looking at the stars, as they hold hands, and cuddling in the grass.

She shook her head, trying to erase the thought.

And, threw the ball, as if she was throwing away her pain and the love for the girl she was never gonna get back, just that easy.

She was supposed to hear the ball land on the grass, but it sounded like it didn’t. Like, someone caught it. She couldn’t get a clear view of who it was, because it was dark, but she didn’t care either way.

When she heard a voice, it made her want to look.

“I-Iya.“ Josie mumbled, in such a delicate and fragile voice that she could cry at any moment.

Josie tried to talk, even though it was clear that she was about to breakdown, as her tears were falling down her damped shirt. Her face, that look, was one of the looks, that triggered Hope. It as one of josie’s someone-hurt-me-that-bad look.

Hope was still stunned with so many questions flocking her mind, on why was Josie outside? Why did she come to the football field? Why did she come to see her? But, there was this one question she would want to ask Josie first, who hurt her?

Hearing whimpers, from the tall girl, shivering with her sleeves trying to warm her up. Running to the arms she wanted the whole time, wanting to cry on her shoulder, wanting her to comfort her. 

“Hope, I _need_ you.” 

**Author's Note:**

> hello!! feel free to comment your thoughts on this
> 
> –––don’t forget to leave kudos, and maybe bookmark it if you’d like <33
> 
> **note: there will be a sequel to this :))


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